ISS

Look, up in the sky! Its a bird, its a plane, its..... Superman? Na its just the International Space Station. Ok, I'm a dork, I know. This is just something that I think is very cool that most people don't even know about.
Did you know that you can see satellites in space as they orbit the earth? This includes the ISS, Hubble Telescope, the Space Shuttle & even a few things that are much more fascinating. Most of them just appear as a small light moving across the sky, very similar to an airplane except they don't blink. Once you know what to look for they are very easy to spot.

To find out when something is going over in the night sky above you, which is every night its not cloudy, check out the Heavens-Above web site. Its simple to enter in your location and see what's up there. Starting on October 17 the ISS will again be visible in the evening hours for those of us in North America. That is convenient for me since I am not much of a morning person, unless I have been up all night. During the last shuttle mission, which was a few weeks ago, they added some extra solar panels. This should make the ISS brighter & easier to see than it was before. For info on the pic above click on it or go to the NASA Astronomy Picture Of The Day for some really far out & groovy stuff. By far the coolest thing on the Heavens-Above page has got to be the Iridium satellites. They are a little harder to see, but they are definitely worth it when you see one.

FALL (part 2) - An E-mail I didn't send to Scott

It just must be the season!
Ok, your probably wondering why start with part 2? Well, I started thinking about change yesterday and came up with the idea for this blog. While driving around at work thinking about it some more, I remembered something from a year ago that i always found interesting and just kinda thought how it fit into my mood for this. I thought it would be a good idea to post it and think about it a little more before completing part 1. It is something my friend Leanne wrote. She is a awesome writer so you should go read her blog. An E-mail I didn't send to Scott. As I was looking this up I came across another of her blog's that is very interesting and kinda fits in with the theme here. In Memory of Mark Parsons....
I really connected with her email at the time. Almost like it had some subliminal message in it just for me, one that only I understand. It still does I guess, thats why I enjoy reading it. If you don't understand it, read it again. Or read my other blog Reflection . Everything here has a very similar feel to it. The blogs and the pix are from late September to early October. So if you find yourself in a blue funk (like the photoshop'd photo above) it could just be the time of year.
Incase the link for her blog wont let you view it, here is the E-mail she never sent to me:

An E-mail I didn't send to Scott:
I had this really good friend from Warner when I worked there, and we held each other accountable to a rule when we were IMing... "No Deleting." You can tell because at the bottom of the AIM screen it tells you "your buddy is typing" or "your buddy has entered text" (that's when they start typing and stop..either because they walked away or they're backspacing)...I don't know, seemed like a good way to keep the friendship open without any judgments, like liberating each other to say whatever we wanted to, whatever was on our minds, without worrying about what the other would think. I say "had" a friend, because we haven't really been friends this entire year of 2005 when something magically changed, but I don't know what, and can't seem to ascertain any reasons or answers. I guess my point is, in response to your e-mail, sometimes people just ramble on, and it may mean something in the moment, but a second later, once expelled, its meaning is lost entirely. I don't know. See? I'm rambling, too.
I'm really really sad today. I think it's the rain and this book I have to read for class called "Gilead." It's about this dying pastor, writing a letter to his 6 year old son before he passes away, and it's just got me feeling incredibly low, and except for the eruption of feelings, there's this apathy on the edges, so I can't quite put my finger on my emotional state, if that makes any sense. And I am really deeply missing my friends at the beach, the sunshine and the waves. There was this magic on Venice Beach unlike I've ever felt before in my life, and I guess I have yet to sense that intensity here since I've been back. You know when you lose a sweatshirt, or something, but you don't notice it's gone for like a month or two, and when the weather gets chilly you think, "Hey, I'm going to wear my favorite sweatshirt (that you haven't needed for the summer)" and you go to look for it and it's gone. And you can't remember where you had it last, but you know deep down you left it somewhere, and feel kind of guilty for not noticing when you lost it...I guess that's how I feel right now. It's not that I feel I'm without purpose, it's just that I feel like I'm lost, and my purpose is to find my way out of wherever it is that I am.
Oh well, it was bound to hit me sooner or later, the fact that I can't just run down to the beach and see the ocean. But man, it really makes me sad right now.
Monday September 26, 2005 - 11:45am (EDT

Reflection

There has been a lot going on in my mind the last three days, well actually the last month. Last night I decided to be friendly toward a person who doesn’t really deserve my friendship. Its that whole Karma thing again, but I will get into that in more detail at a later date.
I was looking back through my blogs today, reflecting on the past. Four of them really stood out. New Years Resolution, Life is Long, New Years Resolution part 2, and Three Weeks. I was almost uncanny to read over my own words. When I first wrote them, people told me how good they were, filled with emotion and wisdom. I didn’t really think much of it at the time, but today I got chocked up as I re-read them. If I hadn’t written them myself I would have never believed that those words were from me.
Life is Long and New Years Resolution part 2 were both written with a specific person in mind. This blog here is written to a different specific person, who is still very similar, so a lot of the same implies. This person is going through a lot because of her own personal mistakes and bad decisions. We have all been there. I hope “you” read those 4 previous blogs and seriously consider your life and how it could turn out.
Life is changing for me as well and I have been thinking a lot about how its going to turn out. For the better im sure. So I will probably spend some time re-reading all my blogs and looking in the mirror.

Karma

Karma means "(the result of) action", generally taken as a term that comprises the entire cycle of cause and effect. Karma is a sum of all that an individual has done, is currently doing and will do. Individuals go through certain processes and accompanying experiences throughout their lives which they have chosen, and those would be based on the results of their own creations: "karma". Karma is not about retribution, vengeance, punishment or reward. Karma simply deals with what is. The effects of all deeds actively create past, present and future experiences, thus making one responsible for one's own life, and the pain and joy brought to others. In religions that incorporate reincarnation, karma extends through one's present life and all past and future lives as well.
Karma is simply the golden rule: what you give out is what you receive - either in the same or in similar form. You reap what you sow - your actions create that which you do live out now, whether this relates to a past/future life situation or to the present date.
Karma is not fate, for man acts with free will creating his own destiny.
Not all karma rebounds immediately. Some accumulate and return unexpectedly in this or other births.
Buddhists believe that the actions of beings will affect their own future, and because of this there are no private actions: all actions have a consequence. The emphasis of karma in Buddhism is on cause, not on effect.
If an individual sows goodness, he or she will reap goodness; if one sows evil, he or she will reap evil. Karma refers to the totality of mankind's actions and their concomitant reactions in current and previous lives, all of which determine the future. However, many karmas do not have an immediate effect; some accumulate and return unexpectedly in an individual's later lives. The conquest of karma is believed to lie in intelligent action and dispassionate reaction.
Unkindness yields spoiled fruits, and good deeds bring forth sweet fruits. As one acts, so does he become: one becomes virtuous by virtuous action, and evil by evil action.

For more info that includes a little to much reading for me or things I'm not concerned with here, you can go to Wikipedia, which is where I got all of the above information.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Karma

Don't Make Mom Anrgy!

Ya, that pic kinda surprises me to. I went home last weekend to see my "Younger Brother" (cant call him Little Brother anymore) play football. He Just turned 15 on the 17th but is 6'6" tall and weighs 220 lbs. He is only in 9th grade but is one of the 2 biggest kids on the team. I didn't have much trouble picking him out even though I didn't know his number. I am very proud of him & I know the Old Man would be to. Not many 9th graders get to play varsity football.

On Saturday Colton came over, so did my cousin Tim, his son & brother-in-law. We spent the entire day tromping through the woods and shooting guns. We especially had fun shooting my new toy, a Glock .45, it was a rush. Even mom fired off a couple of rounds, which I was very surprised. She seemed to enjoy it. It was a good time of male bonding for the Alter Boys. We are definitely going to make this a more regular event. Maybe even change it up a little bit. Maybe shooting bows or throwing axes? Some Pennsylvania Hillbilly fun :)

I definitely wouldn't mess with mom though. On second thought I wouldn't mess with any of us. 15 year old Mikey is a deadly shot with the .45 & 9 year old Shawn had a blast with his BB gun and shooting the Old Man's .22 pistol. Kinda scary lookin, aint we!

9/11

I think almost everyone remembers where they were and what they were doing 5 years ago today. It doesn't seem like so long ago.
I was at the Administration Building in State College to fix a users printer. When I got there someone had said that a airplane had crashed into the World Trade Center. We naturally assumed it was just a accident. We listened to the radio reports as I worked on the printer. It was a shock when it came over the radio that a second plane had hit the other tower. Than it became obvious that there was something devious behind the planes crashing into the buildings. I finished with the printer and called into our dispatch to close out the call. As I was finishing closing out the call I was talking to the one dispatcher Len. We were talking about the World Trade Center. All of a sudden he said "I have to go, they just crashed another plane into the Pentagon". Then there was no doubt that we were under attack. We crowded around the radio and listened as the first tower fell. Some cried, I think we all said a little prayer for the people in the tower and that the second tower would hold. By the time the second tower fell we were silent. I had to go to Altoona for another call. It was a eerie ride. I kept looking at the sky, but there were no planes, no jet trails, nothing but an uncanny emptiness in the sky. I was listening to the news and trying to remain calm. I have 2 sisters and their family's that live near Washington DC. I tried to call them, but the phone kept saying that all circuits were busy. On the way to Altoona I heard on the radio that a 3rd plane crashed in Somerset county, which is less than 65 miles from where I was at. When I got to the branch they had a television on. We all just stood around and watched the news. They had not yet heard of the plane crashing in Pennsylvania. Around 12:30 they told us all to go home. I drove home as fast as I could. I still couldn't get a hold of my sisters, but I did talk to my mother and other family.
When I got back to Tyrone I stopped at Mario's pizza. There were a lot of people there getting out of work early and getting some food to go. As I stood in line waiting for my pizza, watching the replay of the towers falling, I could not hold back the tears. When I got home someone had contacted one of my sisters, I don't remember who it was though. The rest of the day was spent watching the news in shock and disbelief.

The next day the world wept with us. This country became closer than it has been in a long time. There were long lines to donate blood. Everyone had the Stars and Stripes flying from their house or yard. We were united. That seems like it has been so long ago. Sometimes it seems that over the last 5 years many people have forgotten. Forgotten that we were attacked. Forgotten the hero's that gave their life that day to help rescue others in the WTC or the Pentagon and the hero's that saved many other lives by bringing down flight 93. Today we remember, but what about tomorrow. 5 years ago was a day that changed our lives and our country forever, but will September 12, 2006 be just another day. Will we forget we are at war, just because we have not been attacked in over 5 years? Will we forget the humanity & compassion that was shown after that day? There are still people who want to murder us & there are still people in this great county who can make a difference for someone.
God Bless America!

Tytoona Cave

I recently went on a fun hike at Tytoona Cave & Arch Springs. I talked my friend LeAnne into going, but we didn't get to see the entire cave. We skipped the part where you get to duck walk through a foot or two of water with only another foot of breathing room, till you get to a large cavern that is 300 ft long with a 30 ft ceiling. I am excited about checking that out and will be going back in a few weeks. Until then check out her Blog or her Ball of Dirt page. Those of you that know me well should enjoy her description of our adventure. You can also check out the pictures at my Yahoo Photo Album. I will update it with new pictures once I go back in a few weeks.

The Last Full Measure Of Devotion

Now I don't know if I have ever actually read this speech or not. I probably had to read it sometime in high school, but I'm sure I was not paying attention. I actually read it and thought about it today for the first time. It is very fitting for today. Everyone knows the first line, but do you remember the rest of this famous speech? Have a good Memorial Day with the friends and family, but don't forget why we are free to picnic, go to the beach, and enjoy the day without the fears that so many others around the world face on a daily basis.


Four score and seven years ago our fathers brought forth on this continent a new nation, conceived in liberty, and dedicated to the proposition that all men are created equal.
Now we are engaged in a great civil war, testing whether that nation, or any nation so conceived and so dedicated, can long endure. We are met on a great battlefield of that war. We have come to dedicate a portion of that field as a final resting-place for those who here gave their lives that this nation might live. It is altogether fitting and proper that we should do this.
But, in a larger sense, we cannot dedicate, we cannot consecrate, we cannot hallow, this ground. The brave men, living and dead, who struggled here, have consecrated it far above our poor power to add or detract. The world will little note nor long remember what we say here, but it can never forget what they did here. It is for us, the living, rather, to be dedicated here to the unfinished work which they who fought here have thus far so nobly advanced. It is rather for us to be here dedicated to the great task remaining before us--that from these honored dead we take increased devotion to that cause for which they gave the last full measure of devotion--that we here highly resolve that these dead shall not have died in vain, that this nation, under God, shall have a new birth of freedom, and that government of the people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the earth.

The Best Man

Happy 2nd Anniversary to Eddy & Jess.
Two years ago today I was the best man at their wedding. I have never been good at public speaking and I was nervous as hell about the best man speech. When we got to where the reception was at, the wedding planner asked me if I had a toast "ready". I said yes, and asked her how long I had before I gave it. She said it would be right after we came in and were seated. So apparently I wasn't "ready". I had been hoping I could get a drink or two in to relax me before I gave the toast, so I was very nervous now. Fortunately I had a flask in my tuxedo pocket that had some tequila in it. I proceeded to have a few nips, and then a few more. Unfortunately there was not enough time for this to kick in and relax me before the toast. All that it did was give me heart burn right at the time the meal was served, so I could hardly eat anything.

Not being good at public speaking I really stressed about the toast and spent some time writing it, I was actually kind of proud of what I came up with. I thought it sucked at the time, but have been to a few weddings since then and from the other best man toast I have witnessed I realized that mine wasn't that bad. I posted it below and the comic strip above is one I came across while writing the toast, which was 2 days before the wedding. I felt that the strip fit for me, not Ed, he is the lucky one. Maybe the comic was Karma, Fate, or just a strange premonition. Either way, I'm probably a "block head"!

It was definitely a fun night. After the wedding I told DJ to keep his tux on, we were going out on the town in style that night. I'm not going to go into detail about DJ and his layers, LOL, but it was a blast. We ended up partying all night and ended back at the hotel sometime after daylight the next day. Eddy had to tell the front desk we needed a later checkout time because we were not in much shape to get up. Definitely a awesome time.

Congratulations again to Ed & Jess! I know DJ & I had a night we will definitely remember for a long time. :)

I'd like to start off by wishing Jess & Ed a happy 2 hour anniversary. Ed, I think you made a wonderful choice. You couldn't have picked a better best man. This means a lot to me. I'm honored. Usually at weddings I'm the guy sitting at that table back there, you know, that table that gets to eat last.
I've know Ed for over 12 yrs now. We've been best friends since the day we met. We have a lot of good stories to. There was the time Ed saved our lives, from that crazy old man with the gun. There are some times Ed tried to do me in to, but I'm sure those are unintentional.
Even though Ed and I didn't know each other till we were 18, we have done a lot of growing up together. In Youngstown we lived together for 2 years. We both worked at the same Giant Eagle for a while. After we graduated, we even got a job at the same place. The funny part about that is our resumes were exactly the same, word for word, except the name and some of the work experience. And the guy that hired us never noticed. He even called us 5 min apart.
All this time I have known eddy, and I have to honestly say, I have never seen him happier. So Jess, on behalf of eddy's friends, family, co-workers, his cat, and any future EMR's. I would like to say thank you for making eddy a better friend than he already is, a little bit nicer guy, and more tolerable to be around.
So please raise your glass, and join me in toasting Jess & Ed
To you both, a day of perfection. A night of bliss. A lifetime of blessings. And may your home always be too small to hold all who love you.

What I Miss The Most

Just like Life, and most of my previous Blog entries, this one didn't turn out quite like I had intended. What I Miss The Most, I had such a hard time coming up with something to write about on that topic. Its not that I don't miss the old man. I just found that I couldn't come up with the words, every time I would try my mind would wander to other things. Things that made me smile.

Almost everyone at a funeral has their own little moment. A moment alone where they say their goodbye. I don't remember if I said "goodbye" or not, I don't think I actually did. I do remember what I did say though. "You made me proud Old Man, You made me proud." It was such a long day. So many people. It was spitting a little bit of snow that day in North Western Pennsylvania and the line was around the building. Some people waited in line for 2 hours that day. It was amazing, just to hear all the stories about Dad, and getting to meet all the people that knew him and considered him a friend. Some I knew, some I didn't, others I had only heard stories about. I have never seen anything like it, and I was proud that so many people loved and respected him, and that was my father.

I remember when I was probably between 8 & 10. There was a back road between the farm and Meadville that we used to drive on a lot. The road was named after someone, I cant even remember the persons name. Being at that age I wanted to try to express my own opinions. I made some comment about not wanting to be remembered by having my name on some small road. I don't know why I said it, why I still remember that comment of over 20 yrs ago, or why sometimes when I drive down that road I remember and feel a little guilty about saying it. I will never have a road, or anything for that matter named after me, but I definitely know now how I wish to be remembered.

What makes me proud. Its a much more fitting title. I am proud of a lot of things. My family. I know so many people that don't get along with their family. The Alter side has been through some rough patches in the past, but I'm glad to see most of us have came through it for the better. My 3 sisters and my Giant little brother. It makes me proud the things we have in common, and I am so so so so very very verrry thankful for some of the things we don't. I was proud when at the viewing someone mistook my brother Colton for my son. Even though I am much better looking than he is, I was still proud (he doesn't have the internet yet, so he wont be able to read this for a few more weeks).

I was proud this weekend when I got to spend time with Colton, watching him compete in a competition for area football players. It was a lot like the Strong Man Competition. I know Dad was there and looking down on us, and he was proud. Im also proud that for some strange reason, after all these years, I now listen to country music.

I am very proud when someone tells me I look like the old man or that I do something that reminds them of him. One of my favorite stories involves 2 people who have never met him. My friend Leanne was on her way from State College to Altoona, she was going to visit some of her family. She stopped and took me along with her. She saw the picture of my dad and commented that we had the same smile. Later in the evening we were at her Uncle Arrow's place, jamming on the bongo's and having a good time. He had never met me before but said that he liked me because I had a friendly smile. It was awesome for me to have the connection between those two comments. It made me feel very good.

I know that he is proud of not only his children, but the rest of his family as well. He always had a big heart and I'm sure he is proud of the way we have all pulled together and became the family we haven't been in many years. I know it makes me proud. I can see him looking down on us with that big shit eaten grin on his face. I know I have had a few moments where he was looking down and laughing, but this probably isn't the appropriate place to share those moments. Some of those, I am not so proud of.

I know there is going to be some comments posted on this blog, so make sure you read them and please feel free to add your own.

I guess what I miss the most is that there will be no new opportunities to learn ways that we were alike. No new memories to look back upon. Even though I didn't feel I needed to say any goodbye's or I Love You, as I write this there is one thing I wish I could have said to him. "You made me proud Old Man, You made me proud."