This blog was originally posted on 5/13/2006
Ya I know I'm a slacker, I should have really came up with something more original for mothers day than to re-post the same thing from last year. But I'm usually 2 or 3 days behind what I want to write so it didn't get done this year. I Really liked what I wrote last year. She hasn't scratched my car this year, yet, but a few months ago she did do something much worse. I invited her to have dinner with me and some of my friends in Pittsburgh. While at dinner she proceeded to tell them every embarrassing story about me from the time I was 3 days old till around 6. Its been a few months and i still haven't heard the end of it. Its so bad that when my family comes down on Memorial day that my friends want to come along just so they can see my mom and meet the rest of my family for more embarrassing stories. Despite all of this I still love ya mom. I just don't think your funny, even if all my friends think your freakin Hilarious! :)
Well its Mothers Day, but this year seems a little different than usual. So much has happened over the last year. So much that it seems like I have gotten to learn more about your character and strength over the last year than I have in my first 31. I have always loved my mom, but I guess I didn't always know how amazing she was.
This morning in church everyone was standing up and giving testimony about their mothers. How they had loving tender hearts, great wisdom, and kindness beyond compare. I was thinking about what I could say and all I could come up with was "Butter Fingers". This morning as we were getting ready to leave my mom put the first scratch on my brand new car, that I have not even had for 3 weeks. If it wasn't mothers day I would have kicked her in the shin. Later on I was thinking about all the crazy stuff I did when I was a kid. The time I unraveled the blanked she was crocheting, I thought I was helping. Or the time I decided to climb over the book shelf and broke it. I realized that after all the things of hers I broke that the little scratch on my car makes us almost even. I still have a few more book shelves to climb to make up for this transgression.
Actually a good word would be selfless. After my dad passed my mom was a great support to his family. Helping to mend rifts and bad feelings that had lasted many years. She helped keep things organized and running smoothly and peacefully as possible during the funeral. She was a rock for my sisters & I, & even for the people who were not always kind to her when she was married to my dad. When Frank died she did the same thing for his family. Taking a back seat and worrying more about others than her own grief. I have never seen anyone be so strong or care so much about others in the face of tragedy.
I never realized how strong of a person you were or how hard things were for us. I think at times you may have felt bad about how us kids grew up. I remember living in the trailer and my bed room was a book shelf moved up against a corner with a cot in it. I didn't think anything of it. I didn't realize we were poor. I also remember when I had to get my first pair of glasses and you cried because I didn't like any of the frames we could afford. Well the pair of glasses I have now, the frames alone cost $200, and if it wasn't for you and the way we grew up I wouldn't have been able to afford that or any of the things I have today. Including the new car you put a scratch in.
I don't think most people think about how hard it would be to raise 3 kids by yourself. That's something I never really considered growing up. I have a very good friend who is a single mom and is raising 3 kids. Talking to her over the last year has really reminded me of you and a lot of the things we went through as a family. Just like you, she wants what's best for her kids and is willing to sacrifice to make their lives better. That takes a special kind of strength that a lot of people, even people with kids, don't understand or have.
We had a lot of good times though. It was a fun childhood. Even the time you laughed as you beat us. :) I used to think you were the only mother that has done that, till today when the preacher in church had a very similar story about his mom. I wouldn't have changed any of it, the good or the bad. We have lots of fond memories and lots of good times.I'm sure there will be lots more crazy adventures for us all.
I know when I grow up I want to be more like you, just not as clumsy.
Love Ya Mom!
I know my sisters are going to add to this, so please read the comments.
All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother. - Abe Lincoln.
2 comments:
Oh My where can I start….There is so much to say about you mom….You have been the glue that holds us & many others together….I’ve heard you say so many times that you don’t think your as strong as your child think you are…but it’s more like you are stronger then you really know….My Rock…I only hope that I can be an awesome mother like you to my child. Like Scott was saying we weren’t rich….but I didn’t know either….we had so many things that other kids didn’t have....a loving family…I look at so many family’s now…and they aren’t close like we are….I mean how many other family’s do you know that would dance around their living room (not just the kids the whole family) and make up skits and routines to the songs…I mean we even got Scott in on some of them…..I still don’t know which my favorite was….I think with us kids I would have to go with Old Gangsters Never die….I think we need to find that song and reenact that skit for you next timer we’re all home…and dressing up in Scott’s army cloths and doing our soldier boy skit. Because of you I am the strong, independent woman that I am…and I thank you for that. I hope to pass on those qualities you have giving me to my own daughter. I know you don’t always agree with the decisions we make in our lives…but look at a lot of other people in this world you raised us to be very open minded and I think you did a wonderful job raising us…..It couldn’t have been easy…specially raising Scott…lol. I love you so so so so so so so so so so so so much (read that like Lia would say it…lol). HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY TO THE WORLDS BEST MOTHER!!!!!!!!1
So much in my life lately has been measured by the last twelve months, so it seems only natural right now to think of Mom in terms of the last twelve months. I guess I never really saw Mom as a strong person before then. Yeah, there's the time she lifted that car off some guy's head, but there were also the times she came to me for a shoulder to cry on. It's not that I thought she was weak. I just never thought of her as strong.
That thought has certainly changed over the past twelve months. No one I know has shown more strength in the face of so much as Mom has this past year. She dealt with Frank's repeated illnesses long before his cancer diagnosis, and that meant juggling work, his business, and doctor's appointments or the hospital. She was the one who had to call her children and tell them their father was dead and then hold the family together while we all mourned such an unexpected loss. She helped plan the funeral and defuse any situation that could have become hostile. You can only have so many ex's in a room before it gets ugly, but Mom helped keep things civil. Before the shock of Dad's death could even wear off, Frank was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer, and Mom was off and running trying to find everything possible to prolong Frank's life and then to ease his pain. Despite her own loss when Frank died, she was concerned about us kids and our grief from losing two fathers in less than a year. Even now, she's doing what she can to make life without Frank easier for the people who loved him.
On Sunday, my Sunday school teacher said one of our jobs as parents is to raise our children to be capable adults and good parents. Mom might have laughed when she spanked us and tramatized me with dishes and laundry as punishment (to this day I can't stand to wash dishes or fold clothes...just ask Jay), but I look at my girls and see some of the things they are doing and saying, and I'm proud to be their mom. It should make Mom proud too, because she obviously did something right with me if I'm doing even a little bit right with them.
So, Thanks Mom for being the mother I needed to become the woman I am today! I love you!
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